Hmmm. :S

Narito na naman ang panahon na natatakot akong masanay sa isang bagay kasi pakiramdam ko, mawawala rin naman.
Parang ang lahat ay simula lamang.
Kasalanan ko ba?
Hindi ko rin naman alam kung kailangan kong bigyan ng effort upang huwag na lamang itong mawala.
Sana sa lalong madaling panahon, ito ay magwakas na.

You Asked The Reason

You asked the reason, and I groped for the right words because I did not want to sound too dramatic for my age or too shallow for my age. But neither kind of words came out.  I just settled for the obvious reason (which you yourself provided by wild guessing based on what you knew about me, because, on my own, I would never have found it to be the most obvious reason) so you could easily understand.  But it did not feel right because that was not what I intended to answer you with in the first place.  Maybe I was waiting for your cue, a sort of is-that-really-the-reason-why line which never came. I wondered, however, if that line would come later if only our time together was not short lived.  But the hourglass was just too cruel. Or maybe the hourglass was just my scapegoat. Heck, I could have said it all out in a matter of seconds. But I needed a little more push. My courage at almost anything is always below the average level.  I know I needed to work that one out. If I didn’t need to work that one out, you will never have to ask me for a reason in the first place.

Oops...
Can you read between the lines? I think I dropped a clue.

You Are Confusing Me

It started with goodbye
You look at me straight in the eye
There’s nothing stopping you
You’re going for your dreams
And I’m not in those…
I pleaded let me wait
I’ll change you’ll see, our dreams will all come true
‘Cause hey, we’ve come so far
I’m not going to lose you.
But it appears you’ve made up your mind
You’re gonna leave me behind.
So baby stop calling me
I thought you wanna be free
I want to be alone, I’d rather turn off my phone
‘Cause I can’t resist to answer
And still come when you asked me to…
I pleaded let me wait
I’ll change you’ll see, our dreams will all come true
‘Cause hey, we’ve come so far
I’m not going to lose you.
But it appears you’ve made up your mind
You’re gonna leave me behind.
Leave me now, if you must
You are confusing me
Goodbyes are endings, can’t you see
I still love you, can’t you feel
I pleaded let me wait
I’ll change you’ll see, our dreams will all come true
‘Cause hey, we’ve come so far
I’m not going to lose you.
But it appears you’ve made up your mind
You’re gonna leave me behind.
You’re gonna leave me behind.
You’re gonna leave me behind.

Confused

I push you hard.
Yet I want to pull you for a tight kiss.
I ignore you well.
Yet I patiently wait for you to call me again.
I proudly smile.
Yet my heart cries out your name.
I think hard about you.
About the decision I made.
People might say I’m crazy.
But hey, do you understand me?
I need you.
But you do not need me.
I am happy with you.
But you are not with me.
I am just your friend, you say, your only friend.
You confuse me.
I thought you will marry me.